Twas The Night Before Punkmas

Our Punk feminist version of Twas The Night Before Christmas

This year we decided to create our own version of the holiday classic. However, we had to Punky it up. Featuring Punky members and modmins from our communities worldwide.

At Punky Moms we are dedicated to the fight for equality for all those marginalized by traditional societal norms. We work hard to create a community that supports their voices while raising a future that values the importance of communication, compassion, feminism & the general bucking of a patriarchal society.


‘Twas the night before Punkmas when all through the house,

Not a creature was trashy, not even a male mouse.

The stockings were hung on the chimney with care,

With no judgement made on what the owner chose to wear.

The Punky kids were quiet (not asleep) in their beds,

While visions of gender equality danced in their heads,

I was thinking of Christmas while tugging at my tights,

I knew all I wanted was fundamental human rights

When out in the garden, I heard so much racket,

I got up and grabbed my vegan “leather” jacket

The one with punk patches, I sewed on myself

Where’d the kids put the keys?! Ah, up on the shelf!

I did debate on whether to go outside

But I was not going to let the dark be what had me decide.

I was outside a few seconds when what did appear,

But a blood red sleigh, and eight strong reindeer,

Sitting inside was the most beautiful person,

With long golden hair and kind smile, she took a sip of their bourbon

What happened to Santa? Who was this cool chick?

Santa was a woman and looked like Stevie Nicks

“Now! Lilith , now! Hera, now! Virago, and Athena,

“On! Freyja, on! Morgan, on! Artemis and Regina;

“To the top of the fence! Now up on the wall!

“Sashay away! sashay! sashay all!

“Together we must work, supporting one another

Our power is together”, said the amazing Queen Mother

So up to the roof, like magic, they flew,

With the sleigh full of Toys – and presents for the parents too.

And then like a BOSS, she was up on the roof

Confident her words were just enough proof.

As I picked up my phone, and was starting to post,

Down the chimney she came; her tattoos were the most!

She was dressed all in glitter, from head to her boot

Her pit kitties on show and not giving a hoot!

With a bundle of mama merch slung on her back,

And STEM toys for kids, she opened her pack:

Her eyes – what does it matter? Her dimples, who cares?

We feel uncomfortable describing the clothes that she wears.

All that matters, is she rocked, as she came in with glee

No fuss to be had as she layed the gifts at the bottom of the tree

I still couldn’t believe exactly what I was seeing

There was no Santa Claus, just this magical being

I’m sure he once existed, but this story is our own

I still believe in magic, even though I am grown

I knew it was getting late, it must almost be dawn

My eyes were starting to close and I let out a yawn

The next thing I knew I had fallen asleep

She must have left soon after, not making a peep

When I woke in the morning, I felt rested and presumed

since I couldn’t see the kids, were they upstairs in their rooms?

Ay By Gum, A Christmas miracle it was indeed

A full night’s sleep is exactly what I did need

I whispered out loud, thank you for that rest

I feel all sorts of amazing and truly am blessed

Sending love to you this holiday season,

thanks for being here, we truly are touched


About Punky Moms 166 Articles
We are not just Punkers anymore, we are now parents, with the same passions that we always had to make living on this earth a better place. When it comes down to it, we are just open-minded moms, who love raising children…it’s simple, back to the basics parenting…without judgement. Everyone is welcome

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