Punky Moms

Kicking Motherhood in the Ass

I went to a Blessingway

A friend of mine, is having a baby in a few weeks and had her baby shower about 2 weeks ago. I got an invitation for a blessingway however for her that was being held at a local yoga studio. I’m open minded and of course want to support her, so I made plans to go. I was asked to bring a bead and a vegetarian dish..easy enough

Well we got there (I drove her and 2 other friends) and immediately I felt out of place haha. I was blessed with sage (I’m cool with that) before I went into the yoga studio, of course had to take off my boots (good thing my socks matched!). When I walked in they had strewn fabric onto the floor in a path that went into a coil. My friend was brought in blind folded and we each took her hand and whispered something in her ear. I was at a loss of something powerful so I just told her I loved her. She was guided to the middle of the coil and then they played some chanting music and everybody sent vibes to her. Hands up in the air and chanting. Then the leader did a little dance and instructed us to face all directions as she danced about and chanted.

After that my friend was sat in a throne in the front of the room and everybody put something at her altar to give her strength for her delivery (cool). Then however we were asked to massage her, braid her hair, and write on her belly with henna. I passed and sat with my other two girlfriends, both of who were hungover. I’m fine with having a friend give me a massage but I don’t think I could be comfortable with 6 people doing it to me at the same time, and especially so late in the pregnancy.

After some more chanting it was time to feast and we all dined on what we brought!

Pros: Wonderful sense of community among women..two mothers were breastfeeding throughout the whole thing, blessingway meals (which everyone signs up to be assigned a day to make food for the parents after baby is born)

Cons: Multiple massages. I felt like people were rolling around me

The BIG 4-0

The BIG 4-0. No, I am not talking about my age. Today is my sell-by date. You know, that date you will remember just as readily as you will remember your child’s actual birth date. That day most doctors hate for you to even reach, let alone cross.

Today is mine. The BIG 4-0. Forty weeks pregnant. This is longer than I have ever been pregnant before. Both my boys were a couple of weeks early. No big deal, they were also both just over eight pounds, and plenty ready to come out. This baby has shown no signs of being ready to visit Earth-side any time soon.

Oh, I know, babies come when babies want to come and when babies are ready to come and babies evicted early tend to have some sort of complications, usually caused by said eviction. I am not all about eviction. But like I mentioned, both my boys came two weeks “early.” I know, this is not indicative of anything. I also think this one is a girl, so maybe I need to cook girls longer. Maybe she is just stubborn like her mama. Maybe she wants to be fashionably late, who knows. I was kind of hoping today would be the day though. It’s my grams birthday. It’s Imbolc. It would have been a great day to have a baby. I am a little put out that it wasn’t meant to be. I don’t expect to go into active labour and have a baby before midnight, it’s already 9 pm.

I am so tired of people asking if I’ve had the baby yet. Don’t they think if I had I would have posted about it/let them know in some other way? It’s not like I won’t notice I had a baby. It’s not like I don’t notice I am still pregnant.

I am worried it won’t happen for a while now. Lots of stress in the house. My mom started chemo again on Monday, and something happened with her IV medication dispenser thingie, and had to go to the ER Mon night. Today she is feeling quite sick, we had to go pick her up from work, and she’s spent the whole day almost lying down/sleeping (we live with my parents, so this does directly effect me more so than if we didn’t). My 4 y/o broke his collarbone on Tuesday at school. Not a major break, but a break that is causing him pain none the less. My 2 y/o keeps telling us the baby shouldn’t come out. Not only telling us, but outright screeching if we ask if the baby should come out. My husband is suddenly very worried about how we will do it, money, time, stress, you know, all the things he worried about before our first was born and didn’t bat an eye at with the second.

I just feel like she is going to decide to stay in till the middle of April if all this “excitement” doesn’t die down. I know, I am not an elephant, I won’t be pregnant for much longer. And once I am not, I’ll probably miss it. This pregnancy has been awesome. I didn’t hate it like I hated the first. I didn’t just want to get through it like with the second. I truly enjoyed almost all of it. Yah, I started bitching a few weeks ago. I got huge. I got uncomfortable. I stopped sleeping. But up until then, things were smooth sailing. No morning sickness, no nausea, no general achiness to speak of. I was even up and after the boys as needed. I put on a grand total of 15 pounds so far. I’m coming out ahead this time baby! None of this 50 pounds like with Dor, and 30 pounds like with Chai. I had the textbook perfect pregnancy this time. I’ll brag. I deserve it.

So why won’t the baby come out?

I just feel like I have had very little pre-labour getting ready activity going on in my body. I am not losing any of my plug, and with both boys it was gone long before labour really got underway. I am not really contracting at all. The other night I was, to the point they were timable and my back was a mess, but they stopped come morning.

I never expected to be a 40+ week mama. Does anyone? I am not feeling overcooked, or overdone. I’m not feeling tired of being pregnant, in and of itself. I just really want it over and done with already, and to be holding a fresh smelling baby and for everyone to stop asking and wondering and worrying.

I wonder if this is where the stigma about hitting age forty comes from. The BIG 4-0. I’ll hold at 3.9 too, thank you very much.

Jenn is a stay at home mom in South Florida. By day she kisses boo-boos and bakes cakes, by night she is a writer, entrepreneur, lover and all around goddess. You can contact her at<!– var prefix = ‘ma’ + ‘il’ + ‘to’; var path = ‘hr’ + ‘ef’ + ‘=’; var addy212 = ‘Jennifer.Johnpoll’ + ‘@’; addy212 = addy212 + ‘azxuredawn’ + ‘.’ + ‘com’; document.write( ‘‘ ); document.write( addy212 ); document.write( ” ); //–> Jennifer.Johnpoll@azxuredawn.com <!– document.write( ‘‘ ); //–> This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it <!– document.write( ” ); //–> if you have lots of money to throw at her for looking pretty.